Know Your Inuyasha Stars
by Neko Saruwatari
Summary: Can the Inuyasha gang live through the torment? Or just go crazy along the way? Read and find out!
1. Inuyasha

A/N: (sigh) This is the third time I've had to repost this story. I swear if it's taken off again, someone's getting hospitalized. Anyways, aside from my rants, I hope everyone enjoys it! I'm doing InuYasha first. And, by the way, actions will be in brackets.

Disclaimer: I don't own InuYasha! Plain and simple.

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars…"

"Who's there!" Inuyasha yelled looking around rapidly.

"InuYasha…He likes to stuff rabid ferrets down his pants and dance."

"What the hell! I don't do that!" Inuyasha yelled.

"Yes you do."

"ARGH!"

"InuYasha…He likes hearing Kagome saying sit."

"No I don't! That's painful!" Inuyasha said shuddering.

"Don't be stupid! Of course you do, as a matter a fact, I have a recording right here!"

"NOOOOOOOOOO!"

(plays recording) "'Sit! Sit! Sit! Sit!', (stops recording) Don't you just love it?"

(crash) "AGH! Why you little bleep bleep bleepin' bleep! What the bleep is this!"

"Well someone needed to stop you from cussing so much…And it looks like I found a way…Heh… :)"

"Stupid bleepin' mysterious voice…" Inuyasha mumbled.

"InuYasha…He super glues his left ear on every morning."

"I do not! My ears are attached to my head! They don't come off!" Inuyasha yelled.

"Are you sure about that?"

"But I-"

"Anyways, InuYasha…His real name is Rover."

"What! No it isn't! It's InuYasha! I-N-U…Um…"

"Yeah right Rover! You can't even spell InuYasha!"

"Can so!" he sneered.

"Sure…Go ahead then, show us your wide range of vocabulary."

"Uh…"

"Face it, you can't spell."

"I think I got it! I-N-U-A-"

"Ok then, Rover…He likes to play footsies with Sesshomaru."

"Where are you getting all this crap!" Inuyasha yelled angrily.

"Did I mention Naraku too?"

"I'm so close to losing my temper…" Inuyasha said fuming.

"You are? I though you already lost that, or was that your brain? I can't remember..."

"ARGH! Bleep you! That's it!" Inuyasha yelled and pulled out Tetsusaiga.

"Rover…He likes to chase squirrels up trees."

"This is crazy! They're all lies!" Inuyahsa yelled waving Tetsusaiga around like a maniac.

"Now you know InuYasha, or Rover."

"They don't know anything about me! Those were all lies! I don't even know who that was! Come out now or else!" Inuyasha yelled hysterically.

"Sorry, can't do that, I gotta catch a plane away from you."

"Hey come back! Face me like a man! Hello! Hello! Come down here you sissy!" he yelled throwing the 'know your stars' chair across the room and searching around frantically.

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A/N: Well there's the first chapter of: Know Your InuYasha Stars. Hope everyone who read this likes it! And if you did R&R! I except anonymous reviews too! Oh, and no flames! Cuz if you flame a story, why would you read it in the first place, unless your some kind of retard! See you next time! 


	2. Sesshomaru

A/N: Hey! Here's another new chapter of 'Know Your Inuyasha Stars'! Sesshomaru's next because one of my reviewers ask nicely for him to go next, how could I say no? So, here's Sesshy's Know you stars!

Disclaimer: I dun own Inuyasha! Got it!

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars…"

"Who's there? Show yourself at once!" Sesshomaru said.

"Sesshoumaru…likes to flap his arms while jumping up and down saying 'I'm a fairy! I'm a fairy!'"

"I do no such thing! You insolent human!" Sesshomaru said crossing his arms.

"Yeah, sure. Sesshomaru…wishes he was as strong and handsome as his brother, Inuyasha."

"Half brother! And I would never wish for such a thing! AND WHO THE HELL THINKS MY BROTHER IS STRONG AND HANDSOME!" Sesshomaru yelled.

"Oh, quit denying it, you do and you know it!"

"You are the most appalling creature I have ever talked to! Maybe his wench would think that, but I would never think that of my half breed brother!"

"…I thought he was your half brother…?"

"He is- oh forget it…" Sesshomaru said looking un-amused.

"Sesshomaru…he likes to sing 'I feel like a woman' when no ones around."

"How did you know! Ack! I mean, this Sesshomaru would never do such a preposterous thing!" Sesshomaru yelled trying to regain his composure.

"Whoa, to much big words, I feel a headache coming on…"

"I already have one thanks to you!" Sesshomaru yelled angrily.

"Not my problem…"

"It will be your problem when I put a hole in your head…" he mumbled under his breath.

"Whatever…Sesshoumaru…wants to be gay with Jaken."

"Where are you coming up with this stuff! I would never want to be gay with Jaken! All he is, is a worthless toad!" Sesshomaru said.

"Sesshoumaru…didn't say that last night when you were with Jaken. (hint, hint, nudge, nudge)"

"WHAT! You tell one more lie about me and your gunna have the slowest, most painful death ever!" Sesshomaru threatened dangerously.

"That is if you can find me…SUCKER!"

"Grrr…"

"Sesshoumaru…wants to become bestest friends with Inuyasha, so they can live happily ever after!"

"ARGH! Now I'm mad!" Sesshomaru said as his eye twitched.

"No your not, your just constipated."

"Shut the hell up!" he yelled finally snapping completely.

"Sesshoumaru…likes to wear girlish makeup to look more feminine."

"Uh, well…No I don't?" Sesshomaru said faltering slightly.

"Liar, liar, pants on fire!"

"Huh?" he said confused and looked down to see some kid light his pants on fire. "Holy crap!" Sesshomaru yelled attempting to put his pants out.

"Heh, heh, heh….Hey Mr. Announcer guy! I want my fifty bucks!" the kid yelled.

"Whatever kid, you know where to find me."

(wildly jumping around, trying to put fire out) "What! You know where to find that creep, kid? TELL ME WHERE HE IS!" Sesshomaru yelled shaking the kid roughly.

"Uh, your pants" the kid said pointing at Sesshomaru's pants.

"Wha?" he looked down to see the fire spreading. He screamed and continued to jump around wildly while the kid ran away.

"Uh, Now you know…Sesshoumaru?"

(Sesshy's to busy trying to put fire out to notice that it's over)

"Um…hehe…(get out cell phone and calls pizza place) Yep, extra large with pepperoni…15 minutes? Great! (hangs up)"

"Shouldn't you be calling the fire department!" Sesshomaru yelled bating at the fire.

"Should I? Hm, don't feel like it…"

"GAK! WHAT? But I…the fire…and, and-" Sesshomaru passed out with a dull thud as he hit the floor and the fire sizzled out.

"Hm, guess it was to much for him…oh well! I've got pizza! (leaves)"

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A/N: Well, yeah, I know Sesshy was a little OOC, but I think it turned out pretty good! But I wanna know what you thought! So review please! You can also request who you want me to do next. See-ya! 


	3. Naraku

A/N: Hi! I want to thank everyone for reviewing! I luv you all! (huggles reviewers)

Reviwers: AHH! GET IT OFF!

Fine! Be that way! Anyway, I'm making Naraku's Know Your Stars thing this time, I picked at random to decide which character would go next , so sorry if you didn't get who you wanted. Don't hurt me! WARNING! Lots of OOCness ahead…So, yeah, on with the chapter…Oh! And thanks to Dancing Pickle for your ideas! I used a few! Well, read on!

Disclaimer: Dun own Inuyasha and never will!

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars…"

"Come out now or else I will send a horde of demons to eat you…then kill you…" Naraku smiled in that retarded way of his.

"Naraku…Is a weak puny half-demon with powers that couldn't hurt a fly."

"Remember, eat you THEN kill you…" Naraku said.

"Naraku…Thinks all spiders are his children…"

"Well of course they are! I'm the KING of spiders! Look at the scar!" Naraku said pointing to his…freaky spider shaped scar.

"…You scare me…"

"DOOM!" Naraku bellowed.

"Naraku…is a coffee addict…"

"Well, what else would keep me going? The urge to kill Inuyasha? Ha!" Naraku said crossing his arms with a small laugh.

"Um, ok, not working…uh, Naraku…tried to kill himself because Kikyo was going out with Inuyasha."

"Urg, that never happened! NEVER!" Naraku yelled.

"Yeah you sound sure of yourself. Naraku…Loves every living and dead thing on the planet."

O.O "What the f-" a brick was thrown at Naraku's head.

"Ah, ah, no swearing!"

"I can swear whenever I damn well feel like it!" Naraku yelled rubbing the back of his head.

"Naraku is being a bad little boy, he needs to be punished…"

"And just how are you going to do that, you weakling? I'm the great Naraku! I bring fear into the hearts of everyone!"

"Yeah, with your looks…"

"I find my look to be very intimidating! So shut up before I kill you!"

"Ya know, there's always a way to punish…such as….having Jaken grope you! He's gay you know and he loves a strong demon for the taking. Let's bring out our first contestant Naraku!"

**All of the sudden everything turns into a game show.**

"Wha-" Naraku looked around with wide eyes. "Your not serious?"

"Wanna bet?"

(Jaken comes zooming out with hearts in his eyes) "Where's my super hot demon!" Jaken squaked looking around franticly. "oOoOoOoO there he is! If I can't have Sesshomaru he'll have to do!" Jaken said groping Naraku.

"AHHHHHHHHHH! Get this thing off of me! Make it stop! Make it stop!" Naraku screamed girlishly trying to pry the gay toad off.

"What's the magic words?"

"Get me out or I'll kill you!" Naraku shouted once again pulling Jaken away from his face.

"Nope! Guess again!"

"…I know I'm going to regret this later…P-Puh-please!" he choked out, his face scrunching up in disgust.

"That's a good boy! (throws a bone)"

**Jaken and the game show scene disappears**

" I…Will…Get…You…" Naraku hyperventilated.

"Naraku…farts in a can to make the miasma. On sale today for only $999.99!"

"W-what! What kind of a lie is that!" Naraku shouted angrily.

"Not a lie, Kagura almost went blind seeing you do it and still lives to tell the tale."

"…I will get Kagura for spying on me! I-I mean, That never happened you weak human!"

O.O "Dude, your starting to scare me even more than before…"

"Damn her and her spying!" Naraku mumbled, to busy seething to notice.

"Well…Naraku…loves to go dancing naked in the rain."

"Who the hell would want to go dancing naked in the rain!" Naraku yelled getting back to the point.

"…Isn't it obvious pretty boy, you would! Jeeze, this guy is really dense…"

"I am pretty, aren't I? I love my baboon cloak!" Naraku said cuddling his cloak.

O.O "…How is it that you're the only one who can freak me out…Naraku…his favourite show is Blues Clues, he even likes to sing along!"

"That isn't true at all! ….Even though it is a catchy tune…" Naraku mumbled getting nervous.

"What's that? I couldn't hear you, but I think you said that you loved Blues-"

"I DO NOT LIKE THAT INFERIOR, STUPID SHOW!" Naraku yelled with his fingers crossed behind his back.

"Whatever you say…But I saw your fingers crossed…"

"B-but…ARGH!" Naraku shouted with defeat.

"Heh…Naraku…is a nudist."

"I am not a nudist! That is sick even for my standards" Naraku said with his hands on his hips.

"I hate to tell you this but, I have quite a bit of dirt on you from one of my sources. Oh, look, here's a picture of you! Whoa, looks like you had quite the kinky summer!"

"How did…Your lying! I never did anything like that!" Naraku stated, starting to go pale.

"Yeah, well then tell me how I got these pictures?"

"Wow, that's a nice body, now I'm actually kind of glad this is the only job I could get after getting fired from Sesshomaru's service…" Jaken said to himself holding a handful of pictures and giving them to Naraku.

"How…this…" Naraku stuttered a look of pure horror on his face.

"Call me sometime you sexy beast you…" Jaken winked suggestively at Naraku.

"But……." Naraku trailed off lamely.

"(Laughing ass off) Now (gasps for air) You Know…Naraku! (contiues to laugh)"

"So, sexy, my place or yours?" Jaken said seductively.

Naraku looked down at the imp and ran away screaming bloody murder.

"So it's you place then!" Jaken yelled running after him.

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A/N: Whoo! That was a fun chapter to write! Hope there was enough crazy-ness in it for you! Well, R&R or you might just be Jaken's next prey! Ha, kidding. But please review! It would make my day if you did! No flames though! This is just a crazy story I write in my spare time for others to enjoy! And I hope everyone enjoyed it! See-ya! 


	4. Kagome

A/N: Hi! I'm here with a new chapter! (throws confetti) Anyway, hope everyone likes it! Read and review!

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha!

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars..."

"Um, hi. Where did you come from?" Kagome asked slowly.

"Kagome…Likes to chew on raw meat."

"No I don't. I would prefer some ramen or a piece of cake" Kagome replied.

"Right, Kagome…Cheated on Inuyasha and slept with Koga."

"What are you talking about! I don't like Koga! And Inuyasha…Is just a friend!" Kagome yelled nervously.

"Kagome…She's not the reincarnation on Kikyo, she's the reincarnation of a skunk."

"What! I'm pretty sure I'm the reincarnation of Kikyo!" she said crossing her arms.

"Well, you do resemble a skunk, and you sure smell like one too!"

"I told you , I'm not a reincarnation of a skunk! AND I DON'T SMELL LIKE ONE EITHER!" Kagome yelled jumping out of her seat in anger.

"Kagome…Can stuff seventeen oranges up her nose at once."

"Ewww! That's disgusting! I don't even think that's possible…"

"Kagome…Wants to help Kikyo drag Inuyasha to hell."

"I WOULD NEVER DO THAT! THAT BITCH CAN GO TO HELL ALONE!"

"You've got quite a temper, do you always act like that?"

"NO! I DO NOT!" she yelled clenching her fists.

"Kagome…The only reason she goes back to her time is to see her boyfriend, Hojo."

"HOJO IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!"

"Sure, that's what you want us to think…"

"What! He's not! I don't like him like that! He's only a very distant friend!" Kagome reasoned.

"Wow, how many guys is that your cheating on? First Inuyasha, then Koga, now Hojo. Do they know each other? Who's next, Miroku?"

"Their all just friends! Get it threw your thick skull!" Kagome yelled waving a fist in the air.

"Now you know…Kagome…"

"NO THEY DON'T! COME BACK HERE SO I CAN KICK THE CRAP OUT OF YOU!" Kagome screamed stomping her foot.

"Why don't you go stuff some oranges up your nose while you wait?"

"WHAT! I don't do anything you said! They're lies! I don't stuff oranges up my nose! I don't chew on raw meat! And I would never help Kikyo drag Inuyasha to hell! Are you listing! I don't do any of those things! Come back! I still have more to say!" Kagome yelled desperately jumping up and down.

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A/N: Hah! Another chapter done! R&R if you liked it! I love reviews! So review! Bye! 


	5. Kikyo

A/N: Here's the next chap! Kikyo this time! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. Lord knows what I'd do with it if I did.

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars…."

"That voice has an evil aura and…" Kikyo started to drone in a monotone.

"Kikyo…has AIDS…"

"That is absurd…I don't even know what AIDS are vile one…the evil aura is…" Kikyo continued to drone in a monotone.

"Gezze, you sure are boring…What did Inuyasha see in you in the first place?"

"We had a usury, symptom, dysphasia, and a dukedom relationship and it was very sojourn," Kikyo said with big dictionary words that no one understands. (take note that I looked those words up randomly from a dictionary)

"O…K…Kikyo…has never shaved her legs once in her life…or afterlife."

"Uhm…" Kikyo looked around nervously.

"Ohhh…so that's why you wear those long pants all the time!"

"No, I wear these pants because I'm a miko. Why blah could blah blah miko blah blah," Kikyo droned.

"OH GAWD! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! THE BORNINGNESS IS KILLING ME! GRAHHHHHjlngdjlngfklfdahbgm!" A loud thud was heard.

"blah…" Kikyo had a flat look on her face.

"Ahem. Were having a bit of trouble here, since out regular announcer…uh, had a mental breakdown. I'll be your new announcer Bob. PRAISE ME!" a nazely voice said.

"I blah blah blah…" Kikyo said looking superior.

"Kikyo…never learned to tie her shoes…"

"But I blah don't have blah shoes," Kikyo blahed.

"Does it look like I care?"

"I blah can't blah see you blah."

"Again, I don't care!"

"Hell shall drag thy unholy corpse down with and see that blah is blah!"

"Uh…what? Ah well. Kikyo…has an imaginary friend named Henry Lois Frank-Fred the 1st."

"W-what? How do you know about H.L.F.F.T.1! ….My love, he knows about us!" Kikyo whispered to nothing beside her.

O.o "Scared…very scared…"

Kikyo turned to nothing and started to make out with herself.

"….I think I may be scarred for life…Kikyo…is related to Frankenstein."

"Who is this blah Frankenstein you speak of blah," Kikyo asked as soon as she was done with her little 'make out session'.

"He's…well, I should show you! Bring him out boys!"

Some big burly men brought out a huge cage and set it in front of Kikyo.

"Ok now, you guys got the bug zappers ready?" One of the men asked. The others nodded.

"Bug zappers? What about the tasers?"

"Oh, our budget couldn't afford it so we had to go for something a little bit cheaper," The second man said.

"Oh…Ok then. Just let the stupid thing out then!"

"Ok, ok! Like, let open it boys! Teehee!" The third…man said. The other two men got on each side and opened it slowly to reveal…

"WHAT! What's Michael Jakson doing there!"

"It's the budget! We couldn't get anything better! We thought that he would be good enough," The first man reasoned side glancing M.J as he grabbed his crotch in many numerous ways.

"Like yeah! Our like budget like sucks! Oh no! I think I like broke a nail! Gasp!" The third…man(?) Gasped and started to jump in one spot.

"YEAHHH! How's it (crotch grab) going! We can all get through this (crotch grab) with LOVE!" M.J said dancing as the tiles lit up under his feet.

"Uh...This is going nowhere…is it?"

"EEK! Get away! Get away! Your fancy moves and lighting up tiles are BLINDING me!" Kikyo said backing away and covering her eyes.

"Come on! Let dance the night AWAY!" M.J said grabing his crotch again and dancing around Kikyo making the tiles light up around her.

"Uh…Know you know Kikyo…I guess O.o"

"ARG! No! The light! It BURNS! I'm melting!" Kikyo yelled falling to the floor and twitching.

"Uhm, yeah…THE END!"

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A/N: Yes…and that's the chapter! Sorry to all the M.J fans! Anyway, hope you liked it! And about the Henry Lois Frank-Fred the 1st. He was my friends dearly departed little tree that got chopped up with shovels by some guys in her class. She had a small piece of his branch left to remember him by, but her brother threw it away. Poor H.L.F.F.T.1. Yeah, well, R&R! Bye! 


	6. Miroku

A/N: Hey! I'm finally updating! It's a miracle! And I have a new penname! It's Neko Saruwatari now! Sorry for not updating in SUCH a long time. I've been so busy I haven't even been able to write a single word lately, let alone a new chapter. So sorry for the wait! Hope you enjoy the new chapter! It's Miroku this time!

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars…"

"Who's there? Is it an incredibly beautiful woman!" Miroku said a grin spreading across his face.

"Miroku…My only son."

"Wait a minute…I'm not your son! Actually, my fathers dead! Why did you call me your son!" Miroku asked scratching his head.

"Okay then, Miroku…My only daughter."

"What are you talking about! I'm definitely not a girl! Although I take interest in very pretty girls…" Miroku said another grin appearing on his face.

"Miroku…likes to wear pink, frilly panties."

"I wouldn't be caught dead in that! Although some of the women I've met wouldn't mind…"

"It's true! Your such a hentai!"

"It's a gift." He said shrugging with a smile.

"I guess I'll try something different, Miroku…wishes he could be a male stripper at a gay bar."

"GAH? What the hell! Man, I do NOT drift that way and never will!" Miroku said after spitting out the water he just got into Jaken's face. Jaken took the bottle from him with a grim look.

"I hate my job…" Jaken sighed walking off.

"Then why did a gay kid I know keep yakking about a gorgeous male stripper named Miroku?"

"Hey! Other people might be named Miroku!"

"I highly doubt that gay stripper boy."

"No fair…" Miroku said with a pout. Rabid screams could be heard from outside.

"AGH! No! The fan girls! GUARD!"

"On it!" the new guard, Jakotsu said taking out his sword with an evil smile.

"Oh, and before I forget! Meet me after the show sexy!" Jakotsu said waving in Miroku's direction.

"….Even gay guys like me…Great…" Miroku said inching away.

"AHEM! Miroku…like to go to naked beaches…"

"Damn straight!"

"….for 60 or older residents."

"W-WHAT! Ok! That only happened once! And it was a mistake! A MISTAKE! OH GAWD! THE MEMORIES!" Miroku screamed grabbing his head and sinking to the floor in a fetal position. He started to suck his thumb and rock back in forth.

"Well, looks like you enjoyed yourself there…"

"I AM SCARRED FOR LIFE!" Miroku said in between thumb sucking.

"O…K…Miroku…Uh, oh crap! I forgot what I was going to say!"

"Huh? Hey! Your not supposed to forget what you were gonna say! For Buddha's sake! You're the announcer!" Miroku said getting up from the floor.

"Well even announcers forget things Mr. Stripper boy!"

"Don't call me that!"

"Miroku…loves to wear pretty dresses."

"No I don't! I wear robes! ROBES!" Miroku yelled jumping up displaying his robes.

"Miroku…likes to chew on Inuyasha's ears."

"No I don't! Besides, they're covered in fur!" Miroku gagged.

"Okay, Miroku…coughs up fur balls from chewing on Inuyasha's ears."

"Ugh…will you ever stop!" Miroku yelled running his hands through his hair in frustration.

"No."

"I'm suing…" Miroku mumbled plopping back into the chair.

"Miroku…likes to eat Kagome's nail clippings."

"What! Who told you that lie!"

"Sango did, and it's not a lie."

"Really? Oh, is she here!" Miroku said rubbing his hands together.

"(sarcastically) No, she's at my hotel, waiting for me to be done here."

"….Wah? ….I'll kill you! Get down here!" Miroku yelled once again jumping up and positioning his wind tunnel.

"What if I don't what to?"

"Then I'll find you! I WILL…." Miroku said in a squid ward voice.

"Yeah right, why don't you go chew on Inuyasha's ears while your at it."

"I don't do that! When I find you I'll-"

"Try on another one of your pretty dresses?"

"NO!" Miroku yelled his arms flailing everywhere.

"Know you know Miroku…"

"They don't know anything! They were all lies, LIES! Come back here! I want my agent! I'm going to kill you if I ever find you!" Miroku yelled running up to the camera.

"Which you won't."

"I will find you if it's the last thing I do! (camera starts to move away) Hey! Come back I'm not finished yet! I don't eat Kagome's toe nail clippings! I never did anything that he said!" Miroku yelled desperately running all over.

"Done my shift!" Jakotsu said happily walking in. Miroku stiffened.

"And I see my sexy monk has waited for me! Come here my little love puff!" Jakotsu said running up to Miroku.

"Oh dear gawd….NOOO!" Miroku yelled his eyes widening as he ran out, Jakotsu in close pursuit.

"But my sexy love bunny! I thought you stayed for me!" Jakotsu yelled after him chasing. Miroku screamed girlishly as he ran.

"That's the spirit Miroku!" Laughing could be heard from seemingly nowhere.

"HELP!"

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A/N: Another chapter finally done! I've been so busy lately, it nice just to write some humour. Well, I hoped everyone enjoyed! You know the drill! Please review! Later! 


	7. Sorry for the interruption

A/N: I'm sorry for this interruption to my story, but I need to address this subject. Recently, I got not one, but two flames concerning this story. And by the same person no less. I would like to say one thing to this person. If you don't like my story so much, then simply don't read it. Yes, it's as easy as that. Please stop doing this. It comes off as very immature and childish. Grow up, and quit pestering me about this story. So please quit cussing me out and threatening to send me virus'.I'm going to be continuing this story no matter what because believe or not, other people actually DO enjoy this story. If you don't like it, don't read it. Quite an easy subject to pick up on. I'm sorry to everyone out there, but I needed to do something about this. The next step if it continues is to remove anonymous reviews. I don't want to do that to everyone. I'm not trying to pick a fight, I'm trying to write a story that may or may not get a laugh out of the person reading. It's called humour. Basically in this particular story, the 'Know your stars guy' is trying to make the people mad by saying whatever it might be that will piss them off. I'm sorry if offends some people, but that's basically what it's about. Other people have written stories along the same lines too. Again, I'm sorry for this interruption to the people that enjoy this story.


	8. Koga

A/N: New chapter everyone! And before I start, I'd like to thank everyone for their support! It really cheered me up! THANK YOU ALL! Well, I know it's been awhile, but the point is that there's a new chapter out! Worship it! It's your new best friend! O.o Well…um, yes. Anyway, it's Koga this time! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha or any of it characters!

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars…"

"Who's there! Is that you dog turd!" Koga yelled, jumping out of his seat.

"Touchy, touchy…Koga…Beats up any old ladies that happen to walk by."

"Who told you! …Not that it's true or anything…" Koga said fidgeting.

"Koga…Likes to gargle with cow spit."

"WHAT! Okay, I eat cow, but I do NOT gargle with cow spit!" Koga yelled angrily.

"Not only do you gargle with cow spit, but chicken fat too. Tsk, tsk, there won't be any left for the rest of the pack, since you use it all."

"Would you shut up already!"

"Koga…Gets horny when he watches the Teletubbies."

"Wha…I DO NOT! …Wait…What is a Teletubby anyway?" Koga asked in confusion, forgetting his recent anger.

"You're not exactly the brightest bulb, are you?"

"What's this 'bright bulb' you speak of?" Koga asked, his head tilting to the side.

"Oh yeah, forgot you lived in a cave! Guess there's no indoor electricity in there, huh? Where do you go to the bathroom anyway?"

"Eletesisty? What the hell is that? And what's wrong with going to the bathroom where nature intended!"

"Oh…my…god…That's just- Excuse me. (Puking sounds are heard)"

"Huh? What'd I do? Trees are just as efficient as anything else!" he said, smiling proudly with his hands on his hips. More puking sounds could be heard followed by a huge thump.

"My gawd, what is wrong with you people! That's the 5th guy this week! I guess I'm the new announcer…" Another voice said dully.

"I hate you people…Koga…Wants to be like Inuyasha in everyway and get down and dirty with him." Fangirls screaming out side could be heard.

"You see! YOU SEE! This is why I hate this stupid job! Rabid fan girls wanting to see you screw each other, andthen have a threesome with Miroku or something! ...Oh gawd, I'm probably giving them ideas!Why is it that I'm the only one who thinks that is totally sick and disturbing! Maybe you should throw Naraku in for good measure, HUH! Why can't-" A zapping sound was head.

"That guy can never concentrate on the job…Luckily I have a brand spanking new taser! WHEE!" Another zapping sound was heard and a thump.

"Gezze…You'd think he'd know better than to hit himself with it…"

"…How many of you are there! But back to my rant, shall we? I DO NOT WANT TO BE LIKE DOG TURD ANY DAY!" Koga yelled his arms flailing around like crazy.

"Uhm…yeah, back to the show! How can you possibly say that you don't like him! Even when everyone at the studio saw a shrine for him in your cave? The pictures from our ever faithful Jaken!"

"THAT'S NOT TRUE! ….Wait…Jaken? …YOU STUPID LITTLE TOAD!" Koga practically screamed, jumping from his seat and running after the little green imp who was currently serving water and fresh towels.

"AGH! NOOO! Why does this always happen to meeee!" Jaken yelled running away as waterfalls of tears streamed down his face.

"Uh…yeah, Koga…Is the smelliest guy in the feudal era."

"No I'm not! I wash every day!" he argued, crossing his arms.

"Yeah, with crap."

"LIES!"

"Koga…His arch nemesis is Kagome."

"She is not! I love her and she's my woman!" Koga argued.

"You probably don't realize that she's plotting against you right this very minute."

"She wouldn't do that!"

"Then where did I get this '1000 ways to kill Koga' list from?"

"You probably just wrote that! And I can't even see it, so you're proving nothing!" Koga said defiantly with a smirk.

"Well if you wanted to see it that badly, you should've just asked."

"OW!" Koga yelled as a brick flew out of nowhere and smacked him in the head.

"Ow, oh gawd…Can't you just hand it to me nicely?" Koga stressed rubbing the fresh bump forming on his head.

"I don't work that way kid."

"Fine, whatever…How do I know you didn't write this anyway?" Koga asked taking the list off that was tied to the brick. He starteddesperately trying to read it.

"Heh, guess it doesn't help yourreading skills to grow up in a cave, huh?"

"Oh! Shut up! Just answer me! You wrote this didn't you!" Koga yelled turning the paper sideways and upside down.

"My God, you sure are demanding, just like your role model, Inuyasha! Here's an essay she wrote."

"ARGH!" He screamed nearly being crushed by a piano falling from the sky. He went up to the now broken piano and got the essay off of it. He started his routine of turning the paper around and around trying to read it.

"Wait for it…1.…2.…3.…"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO! It can't be! IT JUST CAN'T BE TRUE! Kagome loves me!" Koga yelled sobbing into his fur pelt and blowing his nose in the Kleenex Jaken held up for him to use.

"…Still hating this job…" Jaken mumbled.

"Yeah…Like hell she does. Anyway, now you know…Koga."

"NO! They don't know anything! Kagome would never do such a thing to me!" He yelled throwing the Kleenex into Jaken's face. Jaken picked off the snotty Kleenex and walked away mumbling incoherent things.

"Then you don't know her very well, do you?"

"I still say it's not possible! I'm outta here!" Koga yelled angrily running off and vowing his eternal love for Kagome.

"That was easier than I thought; since both the paper were typed up…Oh well."

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A/N: Hope everyone enjoyed it! Remember to review and leave your comments! (Not flames!)


	9. Sango

A/N: First of all, let me apologize for the wait. There's been WAY too many things happening all at once for me. It's been interfering with my writing like mad! But I finally managed to get this chapter out. Let's hear a big YAY!! This time it's Sango! Let the insanity begin! 

Disclaimer: I no own-y...and stuff...

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"Know your stars…Know your stars…Know your stars…"

"DEMOOOONNNS!!!" Sango proclaimed rushing in waving her boomerang around and destroying random things. The janitor cried for the seventh time that day after everything was once again destroyed.

"I see we're still a few sessions behind therapy, hm Sango?"

"T-they're all around!! MUST…KILL…THE DEMONS!!" Sango shouted, jittering from side to side with her boomerang ready.

"Mm-hmm…And how does that make you FEEL? Well, before we start, give her the gas guards!" A swarm of guards ran out with spray cans marked 'Calming gas'. They began to spray it on Sango who jumped back when silly string hit her.

"DAMN BUDGET!!" One guard yelled, opting to just smacking her into a calm state…Or rather a disoriented state, but it still worked. She fell into the chair with a plop and her head lolled to one side.

"Anyway…Sango…once mistook a tampon for a piece of candy."

"Hey! Hey! Hey! I didn't know anything about these 'tampons' before I met Kagome! So it's just obvious I would've mistaken it!" Sango said rubbing her head from the guards smacking.

"Even after you started to eat it?"

"…S-shut it!" Sango huffed crossing her arms.

"Sango…was caught in a bad spot when Kirara was in heat."

"A bad spot….?! That was more than a bad spot!! I could've been killed!! Luckily Shippo was there…Tossing him at her saved my life!" Sango stressed.

"….Man, that's a cruel way to treat your team mates."

"Actually, I think Shippo enjoyed it…" Sango said with a small shudder, "Besides, he was getting on my nerves. That kid points out the obvious WAY too much! It was driving me crazy!"

"Hence the therapy…Sango…Thinks the Peach man is sexy."

"What?! EWW! You mean that creepy fat guy from episode 57 and 58?! The one who was obsessed with a peach tree?! He could kill someone from sitting on them!" Sango went into hysterics before a thought struck her. "Wait…Was I even in those episodes?"

"Hm…From my information…No…But geeze, you sure are knowledgeable Sango! I would have never guessed you knew so much about him!"

"I guess it was because Kagome kept going on and on about him…and I saw a screenshot…" Sango shrugged.

"Sango…once used the pickup line 'I lost my puppy, hey! I think he went into that cheap motel over there!' on some guy."

"That stupid Monk must be rubbing off on me or something…" Sango trailed off with a sweat drop.

"Sango…thinks Jaken is the single most hottest demon around besides the Peach man."

"Wait, wait…How could I think that about HIM? Isn't he gay?" Sango said rolling her eyes.

"Oh yeah. Sorry! I forgot that you thought Totosai was even sexier!"

"W-what?! No!! NO!! That is just…ew…" Sango trailed off, taking on a green look to her face.

"You can't deny that you just love those flabby wrinkles that ripple through his face when he runs or rides his flying bull! Hey! It's almost like you have a growing list of the most sexiest demons! Peach man in third, Jaken in second, and Totosai in first! Oh, how wonderful!!"

"No!! It's NOT wonderful!!" Sango argued, waving a fist in the air.

"No, I'm sure you like it when Totosai is shirtless, and his wrinkly man boobs accent his grey body hair sticking out of-" (This was extremely hard to write, believe me…)

"STOP!!! AGH!! The mental images!! AHH!! This is absolute torture!!" Sango said trying to cover her ears in a vain attempt to make it stop. Evil laughter could be heard.

"Ok! Fine, we'll be moving on-" a very relieved sigh escaped from Sango.

"Or would you like me to continue?"

"No!! That's ok!! Moving on sounds great!" Sango said frantically.

"Ok then, Sango…wants to see Miroku get together with Shippo."

"You know, there's wrong…But then there's things that are just to disgusting to speak of, that being one of them!!" Sango said, her eye twitching.

"Sango…Wants to make a show called 'Pimp my sandals'"

"Well…" Sango said tapping her chin in thought, "Our sandals **are **awfully bland…I mean, come on!"

"Did someone say pimp?!" Miroku shouted bursting out through a paper background that two men were moving.

"WHY?! Oh merciful god, why?! That took all day to get here without ripping!!" one man sobbed falling to his knees. The other man rubbed his back.

"It's ok Tim…I FEEL YOUR PAIN TOO!!" the other man said falling beside him. They clung to each other crying. Miroku raised an eyebrow at them.

"Anyway…" he said pulling out all his bling and putting on a baseball cap backwards, "Where's mah homies at, yo?!"

Suddenly a group of rappers jumped out behind Miroku and began to fist bump and…other such things that rappers do.

"Get ready for the magic stick bleep bleepers !!" Miroku bleeped since that's what rappers do. He pulled out a…cane for lack of better words and blinded everyone with it's shiny-ness.

"CUZ I'MA P.I.M.P!! Fool' dat yo!" Miroku yelled in a really bad impression of trying to rap.

"A-HEM!! I'd like to keep the rapping to a minimum here people! Now if you please, shoo!"

"Waaahh! You hurt my feelings! I'ma gonna have to krunk you up now bleep !!" one rapper yelled sobbing erratically.

"THAT'S IT!! Screw therapy!! I'll have so much more fun KILLING YOU!!" Sango yelled jumping up in rage and throwing her weapon at the rappers and Miroku.

"Wait! Honey! Darling! Can't we talk about this?!" Miroku begged ducking again.

"NO!! Now take all your little 'homies' and GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!!" she screamed chasing him. They all ran for dear life.

"N-now…you know Sango…Scary."

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A/N: Well, I hate rap. Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. I also like making fun of it whenever I can, which explains this. Sorry if that offends anyone, but that's just my opinion about it. I have nothing against people who do like it. So anyway, I hope you liked it! Read and review! Buh-bye!


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